When it comes to connecting with your team, leadership can fall into a tricky gray area. While you can’t get too chummy with your staff, it is extremely important that you take the time to get to know them. 

Understanding their strengths, weaknesses, and modes of operation can help you know where to apply their unique skills, as well as how and where to offer constructive feedback in other areas. If you treat them as a cog in the machine and only throw work at them, or come to them with problems or shortcomings, eventually they’ll either burn out and leave or grow resentful. 

While you need thoughtful feedback and critique for growth, make sure not to just focus on weaknesses but acknowledge their strengths as well. You want your team to know you have their backs – that you value their hard work.

Getting to know your coaches’ or First Impressions Specialists’ strengths will also help you notice immediately if someone’s performance begins dropping. Nobody likes seeing a row of annoyed parents sitting for ten minutes with their kids waiting for the coach to show up. Rather than focusing on how your coach made you look, however, try asking them if everything is okay. This will more likely lead to a conversation and a solution to future problems.

Ask questions; actually listen. Don’t get caught up in your side of the story. It’s not your job to be friends with everyone, but it is absolutely critical to build a strong, friendly rapport with your team.

This rapport will open up conversations for you to offer critical feedback on performance and growth to your team. Without it, you might find your feedback falling on deaf ears. Ultimately, this will lead to a failed relationship and have you looking for another new hire. 

So how do you build rapport? You can learn a lot from your staff by asking them about themselves, their dreams, their goals and their opinions. Asking questions and actually listening shows your staff that you care about them. Not just as employees, but also as people. You will see that a strong relationship with your coaches and front desk staff roots in their development and growth rather than in your dynamic together. 

When people feel valued and seen, they are more likely to do a good job, and this contagious, positive energy spills into happy coaches, inspired members and higher sales.

Lead by example

One of the best ways to build rapport with your staff is to be direct. Don’t beat around the bush trying to get them to guess what you want or how they’re doing. If you’ve taken the time to get to know them, they’ll have built a foundation of trust in you as well, and you should be able to speak to them with confidence, trust and open candor

If you have a request or feedback to give, make sure you communicate clearly, take into account the bigger picture and approach it with empathy. 

Definitely set your boundaries firmly (“We cannot have you showing up fifteen minutes after class has started, the academy has to operate on a strict schedule”)  but make it clear that you understand life happens and you recognize that this is out of character; you want to support them as best you can.

You don’t know the kind of day your coach might be having – the puke he just had to clean up from a sick dog or the garbage bag that tore on the way out the door. Even in situations where an employee has messed up, it behooves a leader to start conversations with questions.

“Why were you late?"

"Is everything okay?"

"Do you feel like I'm giving you the support you need to do this job?” 

We’re not saying everyone gets a pass or an excuse; certainly people can take advantage of your kindness, but this is where your own discernment comes in. Additionally, the better you know your staff, the easier it is to discern a genuine f**k up and a career bullsh**ter. 

One of the core principles we live by at Easton is “Assume good intent.” This means that even if somebody comes to you with a problem, you should trust that they’re not trying to ruin your day; they’re just trying to do their job, or figure something out.

When you can adapt this sort of attitude in your staff, you will also set your employees up for success amongst each other as they develop clear, intentional internal communication.

Build them up

If you’re going to facilitate the kind of environment that values empathy and open candor, you need to lead by example. This means you might have to adapt some flexibility as you support your team in their individual goals and create a sustainable, long-term rhythm with them.

For example, say one of your First Impressions Specialists (front desk) needs to take a week off to go out-of-state for a family vacation. You have two options. You could get annoyed that you now have to find coverage (assuming she won’t be able to) or that you’ll be short-staffed, missing one of your strongest employees for a week. 

The other option is – you can allow yourself to feel genuinely happy for her because you know how much she values time with her family. You can lean into the knowledge you have about her that she is a solid employee and has always found coverage in the past, and if for whatever reason she can’t, you’re willing to take on that burden because you know how much this matters. 

When you know all of your staff as people, you know what drives everybody. It’s very common for people to work part time at a martial arts academy while also working other jobs either on the side or as their primary gig. To some degree, you have to assume that everybody’s hustling a couple different roles, and build space for that into your scheduling and expectation.

If you do that, you’ll find that you’ll have a lot of really cool people stick around because they can continue to grow in the directions they need while maintaining their connection to your school. Nobody will want to leave. However, if people feel caged or constricted, they will. 

If you want to avoid having a revolving door of First Impressions Specialists or coaches and, instead, gather a roster of talented, multi-faceted and unique individuals, you’ve got to foster an environment that encourages personal and professional growth, allowing each person to pursue their passions and fulfill their potential.

If you’ve never done this before, it might feel alien at first, but it will make a huge difference. Here are some places you can start!

• Ask them what you can do for them.
• Ask them about their hobbies.
• Talk about their training and goals.
• Bring up something you notice them doing well.
• Remember what they tell you in these conversations.
• Bring it up later on to show you care!
• Most importantly: legitimately listen to your employees.
• Care about their successes and personal lives, and value their contributions.

There are many kinds of leadership styles, but one of the most effective ones we’ve found across our communities is the servant leadership style. It’s not about you; it’s about the way you can position all of the pieces in your hand to set everyone up for success.

Daniel Groom, Easton’s newest GM over at Easton Lowry, approaches leadership from this perspective of visionary stewardship, “I want to get the right people in the right places and help support them as best as possible to do their job to the best of their capabilities.”

One of the biggest parts of this rests in your ability to communicate with each person on a genuine level so that you can really see where they shine. With your vision as your shared focal point, you’ll begin to distill their own passion and understand the best way to apply it.

At the end of the day, martial arts changed your life. Now that passion has become your profession. Show your team you care by helping them achieve what they want in life, in or outside the martial arts community, and the positive energy will come back to you threefold.